26 Jul How to balance your dreams and your life
We start out as an entrepreneur with aspirations of building something that fulfills us personally and professionally, as well as other things.
We want the flexibility to spend time with family while enjoying the fruits of our labour, and find ourselves working more hours than we expected or planned to.
It needs to pay us reasonably well for the time we invest, yet if we looked at the income per/hour spent doing all the bits and pieces of a growing business, some are lucky if we are making minimum wage! What’s not working?
Of course many may be making great wads of cash and making excuses that we just cannot tear ourselves away from our work because its MY business and its important! Besides, it’s fun!
What is your success costing you?
Yes we’re excited and don’t understand why everyone in our families aren’t on board! The money helps the family lifestyle, and they seem so ungrateful.
Time to be open and honest with ourselves about what’s really important in our lives.
Before we get too far into this, I want to ask you something. Are you happy? I mean really happy about your “whole” life? Not just one piece of it, but all of it.
You may be saying to yourself, “well nobody is happy with their WHOLE life!” So if that’s you, which part is the most important? Be honest.
If your values and needs aren’t being fulfilled then it will be pretty difficult to be really happy. You are important and at the heart of your family. You get to have dreams and to have them fulfilled.
It is important and a must that you take care of yourself and put yourself first, but what does that look like, and is it still in line with your values?
Let’s say your values are family, relationships, honesty, integrity and health just to throw something together for you.
If you are working from 8am til 9:30 pm, 4-5 days a week then where did your values of health, family and relationships go?
If you are working willy-nilly and not creating the business you want claiming family and relationships are key, then where is honesty and integrity in that picture?
You run all day, likely holding your breath, you rarely (or never) have time to enjoy a relaxed dinner with your family, and you wake up every morning dreading the day ahead.
If this looks like you, the solution is near.
Imagine if you could be in Bizarro World and you suddenly open your eyes feeling enthusiastic about your life. You make some business calls and send out some notes, have lunch with a friend, browse a bookstore on a whim and are home and ready for the family at the end of the day with a quiet mind empty of all guilt and overwhelming pressure.
Call me crazy but this is possible.
You can have it all only if you know what that is.
Ask yourself. “What is really important to me?” Many people are pretty vague with their answers. Take a moment and dig deep; the truest answer will come if you give yourself time.
Maybe it is one or more of these;
- Less mommy-guilt.
- Time and energy for her husband and children.
- Successful business without sacrificing her family.
- A happy spouse.
- Time for the gym.
- More leisure time with family.
- Be a more present parent.
- The ability to leave the work at work.
You may have a spouse, children, and a desire for a thriving business. How do you stuff 20 hours of work into a 24-hour day and still have time left for yourself or family?
Exhausted, out of balance and feeling overwhelmed makes it difficult to figure out how to get more done and where to put your energy and time.
You may feel everything is a priority. How are you going to sort this out?
Do you say yes to any of these?
Are you a perfectionist?
Are you trying to do it all?
Are you over-extended?
Do you feel guilty when you can’t do it all?
Do you lie in bed secretly promising, “Things will be different tomorrow,” then break those promises?
Grab a pen and paper and create three columns labeled:
Yourself & Spirituality
Things that feed you and your spirit like going to the gym, enjoying a book, going to church, 20 minutes of daily meditation. Time with friends or alone time to just BE. These are the activities that fill your cup.
Your daughter’s soccer practice, homework time, date night (you officially have permission to book at least one date with your partner a month – trust me, it does a relationship good), playtime with the kids.
Work hours, networking, projects, administration, travel to and from.
Now look at your schedule and take EVERY activity you do every day/week/month and put it into those columns.
Based on your lists, does it look like you’re in or out of balance?
Is it bad news? Well lets assume there is still good news. Awareness is the beginning of balance.
There are simple ways to get your life into balance. Start by remembering that you are important so move you to the top of your list.
If you are not rested with plenty of energy, how is it possible to keep the pace needed to get even a portion of these things done?
You can enjoy your life when your priorities are aligned with your values. It’s time to take a good look at what they are and know that you deserve and can have it all.
Having it all means full alignment with your values making it easy when you know what they are.
by Tammy Rowland